It's been a while, but I'm procrastinating homework.

So you get an update!

Hooray!

This post is going to seem a bit scattered because I've only gotten four hours of sleep last night.

I've actually been busy with school and work so there wasn't much to update about besides "Oh I'm off to work and I still have this this and this to do."

On a different note, I'm getting really sick and tired of some of my friends' shit. I'm not sure how much longer I'm going to sit back and allow them to treat me like I'm just an acquaintance. If I wanted that, I'd go and hang out with acquaintances.

Today at work, early in the morning, a young woman came into the C-store, looked me in the eye and asked "Is this place open."

I must admit, the look I gave her wasn't the kindest. To my defense, it was about 7:45 in the morning and the only thing that was running through my mind was "If we weren't open would you have been able to walk through the door? If we weren't open, would you be seeing me, standing here behind the counter, dressed as I am (hat, gray campus dining shirt, apron, nametag, black pants, etc.) staring at you? What do you think?"

Not one of my finer moments. I did feel bad about it after I handed her her drink and watched her walk away. After that I was a lot nicer to my customers.

After work,  I wandered home and happily took a shower.

Now I'm sitting in an empty room in Mackinac. It's the perfect place to do hw because there's no one there and no one else is crazy enough to come to school on the weekend, unless they're language students.

After this blog I'll be productive. I promise.

Actually, the real reason I'm writing is because I'm feeling selfish again and writing about it makes me feel a little better. I'm feeling a little lonely because I talked to my beau and I can't stand the thought that I still have three entire months before I get to touch him again. There are so many times in skype where we talk, I just want to reach through the computer screen and touch his face.

This distance thing is really hard you guys. I don't think I've ever done something so constantly exhausting and heart breaking. I feel selfish for a lot of it too. For whispered wishes in the night that he'd come home and for complaining about all this to you.

Sometimes I wish I were stronger so I could get through this without this aching feeling in the pit of my heart. There are moments when I can push it out of the way and forget about it, but it always grows back.

I'm not sure how I can do this. I guess I'll just have to put myself in God's hands.

*sigh* Letting go like that is really hard though.

Anyways, I do need to get to work.

Thanks for listening.
Love and Peace
Elle